Marriage is a unique and wonderful relationship that requires dedication and perseverance. The children of God must reflect their love in all our relationships and marriage gives us daily opportunities to show it.
The Bible talks a lot about marriage and gives us great advice. It is such an important issue for God that He even compares His relationship with the Church with the relationship of marriage. Let’s look at some Bible verses that talk about marriage.
1. First the spouse, then the parents
This verse says that the marriage that God instituted requires two actions. First, leave the parents physically. When we get married we form a new family, a new home and that should be our priority. Of course we have to love and honor our parents until death, but we must understand that as a new family, we will make plans and make decisions by counting on each other.
Second, to unite in one flesh with our spouse: sexual unity and emotional unity. From the moment we get married, we will enjoy each other sexually and seek to walk together in all areas, such as family economy, service to God, and the education of children when they arrive.
2. It is forever
Have you not read - Jesus replied - that in the beginning the Creator “made them man and woman,” and said: “That is why the man will leave his father and mother, and will join his wife, and the two will become one body?” So it’s not two anymore, it’s just one. Therefore, what God has united, may not be separated by man.
(Matthew 19: 4-6)
God’s original design is for the marriage to be forever. Divorce is not part of his plan, He wants us to be together until death. In this verse of Matthew, Jesus admits that Moses allowed divorce “for the hardness of the heart of man.” There are extreme situations of abuse or infidelity that require a drastic measure, but God’s original plan for marriage is for the man and the woman to remain together until death separates them.
3. Brings happiness
God must guide us in the choice of our partner. We receive blessing when we choose within His will for us. We must marry someone who brings joy to our hearts, someone who brings us closer to God and His purpose for our lives. Thus we will walk together and with joy on the path of life such that God leads us.
4. Unity in Christ
Do not form a team with unbelievers. What do justice and evil have in common? Or what communion can light have with darkness? What harmony does Christ have with the devil? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?
(2 Corinthians 6: 14-15)
The word spouse means united by the yoke, in reference to the yoke that holds the oxen together so that they can plow in the same direction. Marriage must be united in every way and spiritual union is vital. We must be united in Christ, both love and obey Jesus in order to live in harmony and for Christ to be glorified in everything we do.
5. Submission as to the Lord
Ephesians 5: 21-22
There is no fear of submitting to each other when we are both full of God’s love. We trust that God guides the other person within His will and we are not afraid that He will take advantage or hurt us on purpose. That is why it is important to marry a man fearful of God and full of His Holy Spirit. If we know that His actions and words are guided by the Lord we will not be afraid to submit. The perfect love that God gives us casts out any fear (1 John 4:18).
6. Love like Christ
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy.
(Ephesians 5: 25-26a)
Christ’s love for the church must be our example. Jesus was willing to go to the cross for each one of us and he did it for love. Human beings tend to be selfish, to seek our own good rather than that of others. But the Christian husband needs to be filled with the love of Christ, seeking at all times the spiritual well-being of his wife, which brings her closer to God and sanctifies her.
7. The right order
Everything in life works best when we follow the advice and instructions and marriage is no exception. For there to be peace and harmony, the order of leadership must be clear. The husband must seek God’s guidance on what is best for him and his family. He must have a healthy life of prayer and study the word of God. The woman also needs to go to God asking for wisdom for her and for her husband and to support her husband in making decisions that will cheer the Father’s heart.
8. Foster sexual intimacy
Bless your source! Enjoy with the wife of your youth! It is a loving gazelle, it is a lovely fawn. May her breasts always satisfy you! May her love captivate you all the time!
(Proverbs 5: 18-19)
God longs for the husband and wife to have a satisfying sexual life throughout their lives and to be exclusively for each other. Marital sexual intimacy should bring joy and satisfaction, not shame or fear and should also reinforce our own esteem. In the sexual act we express our love, our total trust in our spouse and also the appreciation of the way God created us and the other person.
9. Stronger with God
It is said that in union there is strength and this is even more true in marriage. A united marriage is a great example in this world that applauds both husband and wife’s individualism. If both serve God they will count on each other’s help in difficult times, they will receive their wisdom to make the right decisions and the strength to pass the tests. Not only will they support and encourage each other in times of temptation or difficulty, but they will seek God’s direction and persevere until they obtain the desired result.
10. Be a team
Two are worth more than one, because they get more fruit from their effort. If one falls down, help him up. Woe to the one who falls and has no one to lift it! If two lie down together, they will warm up; how will one feel warm just by being with oneself?
(Ecclesiastes 4: 9-11)
Marriage must work together for common goals joining forces to see the dreams and desires that God places in their hearts fulfilled. Each one must ensure the welfare of the other, take care of and help each other. If one falls, the other lifts, bandages the wound, encourages to continue.
11. Start well
Deuteronomy 24: 5
It is interesting to see that in the Old Testament the importance of creating a solid and happy foundation in marriage from the beginning is mentioned. In his great wisdom God encourages us that the focus of the first year of marriage is marriage itself, building a strong foundation together and being happy. Everything else can wait, there will be time for other duties or concerns.
12. Understanding and respect
In the same way, you husbands, be understanding in your married life. Treat your wife with respect, since a woman is more delicate, and both man and woman are heirs of the pleasant gift of life. By doing so nothing will hinder your prayers.
(1 Peter 3: 7)
Marriage is built and strengthened with respect and understanding between them. If we understand and appreciate the other as he is, with his strengths and weaknesses, we will be happier and all other areas of our life will be affirmed, including our spiritual life.
13. Faithfulness and purity
Hebrews 13: 4
For God, marriage is very valuable and reminds us to see it that way. Marriage is sacred. Fidelity between husband and wife is not negotiable: We must be faithful to each other. All types of sexual immorality, adultery, fornication, pornography, all misuse of the sexual act to shame or manipulate the other is unacceptable and will be judged. We must always treat each other with love, with purity, and respect.
14. The power of love
Engrave me as a seal over your heart. Take me like a mark on your arm. Strong is love, like death, and tenacious passion, like the grave. As the divine flame is the burning fire of love. Neither the many fires can extinguish it, nor the rivers can drown it.
(Song 8: 6-7a)
True love is powerful and eternal, it is a commitment to be side by side no matter what. The seal on the heart and the mark on the arm do not refer to tattoos that can be erased but to embedded marks that last and can never be removed. True love will endure through all the seasons or storms that may come. There will be no disease, shortage, or disagreement that manages to turn it off.
15. Build wisely
Proverbs 24: 3
We need wisdom and the Bible says that the principle of wisdom is the fear of the Lord (Proverbs 1: 7). If we want to build a solid marriage that will last we must go to the source of wisdom, to God. He will help us overcome our differences and make wise decisions. If we go to Him every day by presenting our concerns and our desires, He will guide us, and over the years we will look back and rejoice to see how He worked in us and in our marriage.